The Atheologist

Theology is the study of theism; Atheology is the study of atheism. I am The Atheologist. Why don’t Atheists embrace religion when the vast majority of humans do? Why are Atheists regarded by most of society as thugs, rabble, vermin and generally naughty people. The Atheologist will attempt to seek out the true answers to these and many more questions by using logical assumptions, interviews with people of all faiths and really, really good research. The Atheologist wants to know.

My Photo
Name:
Location: United States
  • Definitions , Email the Atheologist
  • Wednesday, March 31, 2010

    Atheist Fools

    The Atheologist recently received the following in e-mail from a co-worker:
    FLORIDA COURT SETS ATHEIST HOLIDAY
    In Florida, an atheist created a case against the upcoming Easter and Passover Holy days. He hired an attorney to bring a discrimination case against Christians, Jews and observances of their holy days. The argument was that it was unfair that atheists had no such recognized days.
    The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the passionate presentation by the lawyer, the judge banged his gavel declaring," Case dismissed!"
    The lawyer immediately stood objecting to the ruling saying, "Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and others. The Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah, yet my Client and all other atheists have no such holidays."
    The judge leaned forward in his chair saying, "But you do. Your client, counsel, is woefully ignorant."
    The lawyer said, "Your Honor, we are unaware of any special observance or holiday for atheists."
    The judge said, "The calendar says April 1st is April Fools Day. Psalm 14:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, it is the opinion of this court, that if your client says there is no God, then he is a fool. Therefore, April 1st is his day. Court is adjourned."
    HOORAY FOR THAT JUDGE
    What a cute little story that is, (although many atheists will scoff at being called, ‘fools’). The Atheologist has in fact discovered many YouTube videos which actually try to depict atheists as being wise rather than foolish beings. In this and this video, for example, atheists such as Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, Ernest Hemmingway, Carl Sagan and Marie Curie among others are presented.

    The Atheologist wonders - if these people were allegedly so smart why they had such a hard time picking out a religion. With so many hundreds of religions and gods to choose from, any dummy should be able to find one to his or her liking.

    And you atheists out there, don’t dare point the Atheologist to the “Snopes” website which states that the above court case never happened because Snopes also states that Einstein never humiliated one of his college professors or that another college professor never dropped a piece of chalk or that a Marine never knocked out a college professor. In fact, if an atheist perused the ‘Snopes’ website, especially the, 'glurge', section, for any length of time, that atheist may come to believe that college professors don’t exist either.


    Very Important:  If you don't send the above e-mail to at least 56,000 friends in the next 95 minutes, a large pigeon with diarrhea will land on your head this afternoon and the fleas from 18 camels will infest your armpits. I know this will occur because it actually happened to the Atheologist's mother-in-law's friend’s second cousin’s husband's barber.


    The Atheologist

    2 Comments:

    Blogger FreeYourMind said...

    Man...I get that you're pulling a satire with this one, but the stupidity of it still stung...

    Good job, I guess...that's what a good satirist should do.

    9:21:00 AM  
    Anonymous Anonymous said...

    If you an Atheist, you should see this...hurry


    http://www.spiritlessons.com/Documents/Rawlings/Dr_Rawlings_Near_Death_Experiences.htm

    1:37:00 PM  

    Post a Comment

    Links to this post:

    Create a Link

    << Home