The Atheologist

Theology is the study of theism; Atheology is the study of atheism. I am The Atheologist. Why don’t Atheists embrace religion when the vast majority of humans do? Why are Atheists regarded by most of society as thugs, rabble, vermin and generally naughty people. The Atheologist will attempt to seek out the true answers to these and many more questions by using logical assumptions, interviews with people of all faiths and really, really good research. The Atheologist wants to know.

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  • Friday, May 08, 2009

    Ohio Christian School Tells Student To Skip Prom

    A student at a fundamentalist Baptist school in Findlay Ohio, that forbids dancing, rock music, hand-holding and kissing will be suspended if he takes his girlfriend to her public high school prom, principal Tim England said. Despite the warning, 17-year-old Tyler Frost, who has never been to a dance before, said he plans to attend tomorrow’s Findlay High School's prom.
    Frost, a senior at Heritage Christian School in northwest Ohio, agreed to the school's rules when he signed a statement of cooperation at the beginning of the year said principal Tim England, and he continued:

    “When Tyler made the agreement with the school and God, he knew all about the terrible temptations that the secular world would unload upon him. We are only looking out for him. Those secular heathen atheistic students, who attend that secular atheistic heathen school, are very adept at dancing, kissing, alcohol drinking and sex. Tyler’s lack of experience in those areas would cause him great embarrassment and distress. We all know how narrow-minded those who attend those types of schools can be and wish to shield him from the unnecessary humiliation. Besides, although this so called, ‘prom’, will be under adult supervision, the so called supervisors are of course most likely, heathen, evil atheistic nonbelievers who are not worthy to stand before the Lord, and are therefore, by definition highly intolerant of those of us with much higher morals. And mother's day is coming up, so, happy mothers, day to all of you mothers out there; even Tyler’s skanky girlfriend’s mother”.

    This situation is obviously based on similar incidents taken from the movie 'Footloose', and the Atheologist hopes that everyone sticks to the script so that a happy Hollywood ending will bring it to a close.

    The Atheologist

    2 Comments:

    Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Wow, I wish I was adept at sex. :-\

    Too bad me and my atheist girlfriend want to make a commitment to each other before taking our relationship that far.

    10:32:00 AM  
    Blogger Dr. Kold_Kadavr_flatliner, M.D. said...

    Grrr. Git some followers.

    6:30:00 PM  

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